#and each individual rep feeling like nothing really...until it doesn't

[post-abhumanism]

strength endurance: the training modality that will have me nauseous and every last muscle quivering, yet still thinking "did I even do anything"

[mamamittens]

Reader who got turned into a child with platontic yandere strawhats.

My god this crew is already chaos, and that's with One (1) Baby on Board (possibly more depending on your babygirl headcanons). Ngl, not super heavy in the yandere category, but I tend to make yandere groups lighter since they balance each other out more than small teams and it's harder to 'upset' the balance with so many people. Individuals may be unhinged af to make up for a lack of control, but groups can quietly distract you while the shady shit happens elsewhere. That and it's a kid, so there's less opportunity to meaningfully upset the dynamics.

Luffy is, of course, thrilled cause child reader is so impressed and enthused with damn near everything on top of being clingy. Screams laughing every time he launches them to another crewmate. Loves just bundling up the kiddo to run around with if they happen to go to an island. Food runs are with kiddo in front to distract Sanji cause he's not going to let a kid go hungry regardless of gender, though he will still gladly punt Luffy for stealing.

Reading time with Robin! Reading time with Robin! Robin loves hanging out with child reader raptly listening to everything she reads. If Reader can't read yet, she will teach them despite knowing they'll turn back eventually. Just really likes the chill, soft hang out time and absolutely gives %100 of her attention to anything the kiddo brings. Sometimes adding small, neat fun facts to enrich the experience.

Sanji is very careful with baby in the kitchen but will fondly have them assist with small tasks like carrying over food items and things that won't break if dropped. Can and will walk them through fun recipes with them on his shoulders, taste testing along the way. If he doesn't think they're old enough for cutting, he'll gladly let them mix or mash potatoes. Has them lowkey on Luffy watch to give the captain sad, weepy eyes that "you can't wait for the surprise, luffy 🥺?" works like a charm.

Zoro is weirdly good with kids and will jokingly engage them in a workout. Lifting the baby barbells for like, five reps before exaggerating how bored he is of his weights and inviting kiddo to sit on them only to effortlessly keep going. Or like, sitting on his back with an extra bounce to make them laugh. Naptimes are spent tucked into his yukata (it's a yukata, right? Either than or kimono, I'm not sure of the difference, but you get what I mean). Very easily gets Reader to settle down. Traveling with Reader is fun cause he will actually listen to Reader's directions and only get's lost like... 1/3 less of the time.

Nami is slightly awkward around kids for a moment before she just starts emulating her late mother. Getting them to help pick and sort her fruit harvests or doing small tasks to make them feel useful like delivering messages to the crew. Is the first to tie them down if the weather threatens to turn foul just in case or sends them below to 'watch over' supplies that she knows damn well aren't going anywhere. Might even go over budgeting (child friendly version) with them. Has an incredible aversion to engaging in map making with them due do her past trauma but, if the condition persists, she will eventually have them help pick out ink and paper, perhaps even letting them draw with pencils on scrap paper. But nothing more than that.

Franky has a blast making small inventions for child reader to pilot around with hilariously over the top safety added on top. Like a helmet for a bike with an auto targeting system that activates if they cry. Will gladly carry them around on his shoulders while showing off the many neat tricks he put into the Sunny. Has them 'help' with projects, at first forgetting that they can't carry whole ass beams of wood before giving them buckets of nails and whatnot.

Ussop is literally in his element entertaining the kid with wild tall tales until it's time to eat. The first to lift reader into the air if anything remotely dangerous happens before running off to a safe distance. Probably gives them a little sling shot to 'assist' in fights while he praises them endlessly for incredible aim (even if they never get close). Probably the first to make a child carrier to fights so they can 'watch his back for him' despite being a long distance fighter.

Child Reader will be absolutely floored by Brook, undoubtedly. Just wide eyes watching him play in awe as he shows off. Probably letting them play with his hands and the many small bones, quietly informing them of their proper names. If they promise to be gentle, he even lets them touch his hair. If he's got a child-sized instrument, you can bet he's giving them lessons on how to play. If not, he probably talks them through music theory while demonstrating the notes and details. I imagine he plays piano with their hands under his to give the illusion of skill while he idly comments on how much better it is to play with someone else.

Chopper is really thrown to have someone as short as himself around but he's happy to have their help. It's kinda hard to do some things without opposable thumbs, alright? Of course, work never lasts, so he's off to play with them in due time, really livening up the ship as Reader compliments him endlessly about literally anything. And he gives them fun health advice on top of convincing them to eat whatever healthy food Sanji makes (because we all know it'll slap, but kids don't typically jump right into gross healthy food).

Jinbe has a bit of an awkward standoff at first, unsure if the reader will be frightened until they gleefully marvel over his fishman attributes right down to his skin color and webbed hands. The one to swim with them (or just hold them in the water if they've got a devil fruit) never letting them go for a second. Has them 'help' steer the ship on occasion, making them think it's effortless for a child when in reality he's guiding them through it entirely. Talks about the people in his life that he misses with them, glad to have a child marvel at the great but dearly departed. Legitimately tears up when they console him in that special, innocent child-like way at the news that they'll never get to meet these people because their gone.

Now, the Thousand Sunny also has plenty of love to give in a much more... quiet way. Soothingly rocking child reader to sleep when they're struggling and no one sees it. Secretly guiding them to fun little cubbies and passages to spook the crew and captain. They may not be there physically, but the spirit is definitely guiding them every step of the way in the rare moments they're alone.

Of course, engaging in a fight while the reader is a vulnerable child is a terrible mistake. At first the crew will fight normally, shielding the reader and guiding them to less dangerous parts, but the minute it looks like they'll even get grazed a rubber limb is sending the perpetrator into the stratosphere. Assuming a flaming leg, swords, bullet, hands, water, staff, hoof, or (insert robo-tech here) doesn't do it first. Might even be a race as they keep the atmosphere light to make sure child Reader knows that they're still safe.

God forbid you make the baby cry.